Thursday, January 13, 2011

A Third-Tri Hormonal Shift

A friend recently posted a great question: "How is Your Marriage?" It was a wonderful post that reminds us all that we need to show concern for others.

But, mostly, it reminded me of how truly amazing my husband is.

I mentioned previously, that my husband and I made the decision to forego depression medicine while I am with child.

I have continued with weekly therapy appointments, just to make sure someone is keeping an unbiased eye on my mental health - for my sake and my baby's. This week, my therapist and I agreed that meeting twice a week is probably going to need to occur for the remainder of this pregnancy.

This pregnancy has not been easy for me. I have enjoyed my pregnancy. It's been a wonderful experience for myself, my husband, my family and friends. But truthfully, it has been physically difficult. I am not used to being hindered in any form, so to be unable to write because my hands hurt, to be unable to sit because my ribs hurt, or to be unable to sit on the floor playing with my stepson because it is WAY to hard to get back up, is just, well, difficult for me emotionally. I have spent (probably WAY too much time and) energy lamenting the difficulties and berating myself for being "less than perfect."

My husband, however, has been such a trooper! He rubs my hands, he makes me lie down, he spends extra time with Brytin so he doesn't feel left out, and he tells me often how beautiful I am :)

And the last couple weeks...well, let me tell you, my husband deserves a medal.

You see, throughout a female's life, there are various hormonal shifts in her body and brain that prepare her for the next step. For example, when a girl is around 14, she begins this journey towards motherhood. Truthfully, it is based on societal circumstances of our cave-dwelling days. We never evolved away from needing a gaggle of women to help us raise our children. So when a girl is 14, she becomes UBER social with the subconscious intent of forming a network to help her when she births her child(ren). Please read the Female Brain. Seriously.

Anyway. I can't prove it either way, but I think that at the beginning of my third trimester, my brain had a hormonal shift towards protecting my connection with my husband AT ALL COSTS. In preparation for the onslaught of changes that will occur once the baby is born, my brain is hell-bent on making sure my marriage goes into that difficult time fully intact. In turn, I've become a little psycho...

I don't mean like Glenn Close boiling a rabbit psycho, I just mean we've been having more "issues" lately than I'd like. Even though I do not think he is wholly innocent in these situations, I can honestly say that my hormones have definitely contributed to my irrational outbursts.

Thankfully, I believe I've finally got a grip on it. Thankfully, my husband is an amazing man. Thankfully, I have friends and family (and a therapist) who are always willing to support us in any way they can.

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