Exercises in Writing

Thanksgiving Tradition

2011-11-27T12:45:00.000-08:00

I tried not to tell you, but I just can't help myself. I just have to list for you the groceries I bought for $75.12 this year. (That's only $6.89 more than I spent last year. I think I beat inflation!)

50 lbs of turkey
12 lbs of ham
2.5 lbs chicken legs
2 lbs of bacon
1.5 lbs of tilapia
6 bagels
1 bag mini marshmallows
16 biscuits
28 oz Folgers
1 lb butter
8 oz cream cheese
24 oz sour cream
1/2 gal orange juice
1 can yams
2 cans chicken broth
3 cans peas
3 cans corn
3 cans cranberries
4 lbs sugar
3 pkgs pasta
6 cereal bars
15 lbs potatoes
1 loaf wheat bread

And thanks to WIC, I also got:
1 gal and 1 quart milk
18 oz peanut butter
16 oz sharp cheddar cheese
1 dozen eggs
3.5 lbs yams
3 bunches green onion
2 lbs sweet potatoes
3 bunches celery
2.75 lbs onions
2 lbs green grapes
2 lbs red grapes
1 lb carrots
1 lb tomatoes
1 lb zucchini
2 lbs pears
2 lbs cantaloupe

I love grocery shopping :)

I also had a fabulous time Wednesday and Thursday cooking with my teenager. We made a plateful of dishes!

Clockwise from top: black eyed peas, turkey, stuffing, glazed carrots, green bean casserole, mashed topatoes, collard greens, sweet potato casserole and candied yams.

I am very thankful this year!

The English Language is a Mighty Splendid Thing!

2011-10-02T10:56:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Daily Writing Tips for this list of grammar blogs!!

Wordsplosion!

English FAIL

This particular post made me laugh so hard, I spewed coffee on my computer screen!

And the BEST blog EVER!!!! Or should I say, "The 'BEST' blog EVER!!!!"

Some Lessons Learned From My Dad

2011-09-02T07:35:00.000-07:00

People with a different last name can be the greatest family you've ever had.
Sometimes, you're gonna get shit on. It's ok, you can always take a shower.
Always be nice at Christmas.
It's ok to call someone three times in an hour if you really miss them.
Talk to those you love everyday if you can.
A stick of butter makes anything taste delicious.
Buy what you want and figure out how to pay for it later. (Not my favorite lesson.)
When your kid makes stupid choices, love her anyway.
Be the best friend you know how to be. And always have time for an old friend.
Biological family is important - but don't let them treat you poorly.
Your spouse IS your better half. Love her like there is no tomorrow.
People need help. Have your truck, trailer or trunk ready. There's usually an ice cold MGD waiting.
Lighten up. Seriously. Life is meant to be lived.
Anything can be deep fried.
Never gamble with scared money. If you are scared to lose it, it's almost guaranteed you will.
September 2nd is an AWESOME day for a party. (And if your daughter throws a party for 60 of her closest friends while you are away camping, don't kill her.)

Happy Birthday, Dad!
I used the extra big font just for you ;)

*Links provided to prove I really learned the lesson. LOL

2011-09-01T06:45:00.001-07:00

Exam Day is normally so nerve-wracking. Today, however, I am at peace. I am excited for my husband. I am anticipating his success!

Technology is NOT to be trusted

2011-08-31T23:53:00.000-07:00

I kept IMPECCABLE notes about Daelen in my phone. The most minute details that probably won't matter a year from now, but matter to me at the moment. Any and every little thing. Literally, every time he ate. Every time he did something new. Any time I felt the urge to just record who/what/where he was at that very moment. And it was so easy cuz I always have my phone with me.

The first two months, I was really good about emailing the data to myself periodically, just in case. Then I transferred that info to his baby book, his first year calendar and/or the notebook journal I started for him while pregnant. Because of the carpal tunnel, I had gotten away from the notebook, but now I see I'm going to have to go back to it. Technology is not to be trusted. Pen and paper, that's where it's at.

I've lost all my notes from 15 August to 31 August. I could cry. Do you have any idea how many truly amazing, wonderful, heart-melting things happen with a baby in 15 days?!

But alas, there is a lesson here, and this time, I will learn it. I am a writer (in my own mind). I am not a blogger, a Facebooker or a technology guru. I am a pen and paper writer. And my son WILL be blessed as an adult with all the letters, notes, stories and information I will record for him over the next 18 years.

posted from Bloggeroid

Heart on My Sleeve

2011-08-30T11:32:00.000-07:00

I'm an emotional* person. Always have been. Histrionic** is how a psychologist described it once. If you know anything about a Scorpio***, you know what I mean. Extremely emotional - and in a pendulum swing kind of way. I lack the ability to be lukewarm, apathetic and/or neutral. I do not like anything - I either love it or hate it (and I mean capital L-O-V-E love or I'm gonna kick you in the neck, staple Bacon to your face and piss on your dog HATE). If you look up hyperbole in the dictionary, my picture is totally there.

(Un)fortunately, I am the same whether we are talking about inanimate objects, animals or human beings. If I love you, I would seriously kill for you****. Some people don't participate in relationships like I do - family, friend, lover, whatever - if I love you, you are a priority. Always.

I'm extreme. I know. I try to tone it down. I try to let folks breathe. I really don't mean to smother. (I'm sorry if I've ever smothered you.)

All this to say, when I think a person is cool or pretty or smart or righteous or brilliant or fantastic, I REALLY think they are cool or pretty or smart or righteous or brilliant or fantastic. I don't necessarily want to spend every waking minute with them, but I do want to soak up everything they've got. (Not steal it, just dissect it so I can learn more about the human psyche and possibly become a better person myself.) And I have no problem telling you I think you're coolest thing since sliced bread.

The reason I write all of this is to tell you that I get hurt easily. I wear my heart on my sleeve and often times it feels like it should be the stereotypical heart with a dagger through it. So often I feel rejected or abandoned and it crushes me. I pour my heart and soul into people and relationships and so often (it seems) I get shit on.

Fortunately (for you), I have no intention of changing. I will continue to give my everything to the the people I love, people I adore and people I think are just all-around "good eggs." So, consider yourself warned. If you show yourself to be awesome, I just might try to sit at your feet and soak up your awesomeness.

* I think my husband was uber excited today when my emotional outburst literally had nothing to do with him!

** Google, you never cease to amaze me. There is an actual disorder for histrionic people!

*** It is as if someone described a Scorpio woman to me when I was 2, and I said, "Okay, I can be that."

**** Seriously, I'll fucking kill her and take the rap and be totally cool with it, because I love you.

GOOD

2011-08-27T11:32:00.000-07:00

Everything is going so good. And given the circumstances, honestly, I'm surprised that I am saying that. It's been so long since I felt this this way. Honestly, I feel like Pollyanna. I'm so giddy with joy and thankful for all the blessings in my life. My hormones must be changing again.+

My mother- and sister-in-law moved in over the summer. Brytin is slam-dunking the second grade. Chris and I are getting along smashingly. And Daelen, well, truly he is THRIVING.

The truth is, a couple weeks ago, Chris and I fought for an entire weekend. And I mean knock-down, drag-out fought. Mean things were said, feelings were hurt, voices were raised, the tires on the truck peeled out of the driveway a time or three. And every time there was some resolve, it started up all over again about a different issue.

But then, Sunday night (LATE Sunday night) we looked at each other and realized neither of us was leaving, all the shouting wasn't getting us anywhere and really, time was just too precious to have wasted a whole weekend fighting.

But as I look back over the last couple weeks, I see how happy our (crowded) home is, I see how in love with me my husband is, I see how NOT irritated I am. Maybe 2.5 days of yelling was exactly what we needed?! I'm not angry anymore, he's putting forth some effort, and I'm not angry anymore!+

Praise the good Lord God Almighty the Broussard home is healthy, happy and a little wiser!

+Did you read the Female Brain like I told you to?!

+Did I mention I was pissed the F*&$ off?! I mean like SERIOUSLY - about EVERYTHING. Here's an example (that doesn't really shed light on how pissed I was, because I didn't want to actually post on the Internet the anger I felt that morning.)

posted from Bloggeroid

TOTALLY Guilty!

2011-08-16T09:12:00.000-07:00

I use almost ALL of these words. I use them in my speech, my texts, my writing and my Internet postings. Oops.

5 Slang Words That May Never Be Legit
by Mark Nichol
OK, like, OMG, I’m totally not bagging on you for tweeting or FBing or blogging these words, but they are so bogus in formal writing. LOL

1. Amirite
This trendy favorite of commenters on pop-culture Web sites, meant to suggest a glibly tossed “Am I right?” — I figured that out after initially wondering what the heck uh-mere-uh-tee meant — has about as much chance of making it into the dictionary as fuhgeddaboudit. Save it for the fanboys — you can do better than that.

2. Craptastic/craptacular
These mash-ups of, respectively, crap and fantastic and crap and spectacular first cropped up in snarky online lambasting of overhyped pop-culture phenomena in the 1990s. I chuckled the first couple of times I came across them, but though they are ideal terms for assuming a sarcastic tone, they are best used in moderation and are not, and perhaps will never become, mainstream expressions of derision. Safer alternatives for general publication include absurd, laughable, ludicrous, preposterous, ridiculous, and risible.

3. Genius
Out of seemingly nowhere, online correspondents began to use this as a short form of ingenious, as in “That’s such a genius move.” It has not acquired legitimacy, and in other than jocular usage, you don’t have to be a genius to avoid it.

4. Ginormous
This collision of gigantic and enormous, dating from the 1990s, is a vivid term, but it is superfluous, considering that humongous, which also seemed to appear spontaneously in casual usage when it came on the scene in the 1960s, has already acquired a respectability the newer term as yet lacks.

Plenty of words meaning “extremely large” exist: colossal, gargantuan, gigantic, immense, mammoth, massive, monstrous, prodigious, titanic, and vast, for starters. None of them has the neologistic cachet of ginormous, but the letter is for now only suitable in informal writing.

5. A Slang Word That Isn’t
The adjective cliche, used in place of cliched, as in “That’s so cliche,” was originally on this list, until I looked it up and discovered, to my surprise, that it is a legitimate variant. Its sudden recent vogue lured me into thinking it was being misused in an affected manner much like the adjective genius (see above) is. It’s correct, but you’re welcome to use one of many synonyms, like hackneyed or trite.

Kurt Sutter Understands Me

2011-06-29T01:41:00.000-07:00

There is a recent trend in blogging - being blatantly rude, but truthful about everyone. And everything that annoys you. It started for me with Moms Who Drink and Swear and blossomed into a collection of about seven blogs that I follow.

And then the bug hit me. I wanted a part of the action so badly. People bug me too! I never tell people what I REALLY think. And posting how I really feel on the Internet would be so therapeutic! Besides, I could be anonymous, right? Who knows? Maybe under a pseudonym, I'll get the recognition I desire.

And then, I got the recognition I desired, and it wasn't pretty.

For the first time ever, a stranger stumbled upon one of my blogs via Google. And this particular stranger was NOT happy with the particular post he stumbled across. He then proceeded to tell 150 of his closest friends what I had said.

Finally, after writing for 23 years about my thoughts, feelings, and opinions, finally some stranger saw my writing - and told all his friends. And even left comments! Unfortunately, the piece they stumbled upon was not my finest work...I was so heartbroken...

I feel like I got dragged down into this negative place, but I don't want to reside there anymore. This incident with my blog post broke my heart, but it snapped me back into my own reality. I'm not snarky, sassy, hurtful or disrespectful. I try, but I am more naturally kind, compassionate, considerate, sensitive, caring and so much more simultaneously.

And then today I read a recent blog posting from Kurt Sutter, the genius behind Sons of Anarchy. And truly, it sums up exactly where my head was at.

I'm exhausted by my own self-righteousness. Really. I have so many fucking opinions that feel so weighty and so relevant to the future of mankind, that I realized I'm just a fucking delusional downer. I know that sounds extreme and I don't regret anything I've said, but lately I've become very aware that my angry outbursts serve no purpose other than to relieve some small amount of pressure from my obsessive need to be understood. And by understood, I mean loved, worshiped and adored. I'm not a dick. Okay, not all the time. For the most part, I'm a fairly reasonable dude, but when I take a hit off of any fucking injustice pipe, man, I am fucking hooked on a feeling. High on believing, that you're in love with me. Ouga Chaka.

Fathers and Daughters

2011-06-19T11:48:00.000-07:00

I don't have the emotional strength to relive the past for you today. But I hope you might take the time to read what I wrote when I had the strength.

Nature vs. Nurture
A Girl Needs Her Daddy
An Old Journal Writing

I don't have the time to write some beautiful prose about how my stepfather has come to be a father that I truly love. But trust me when I tell you, he has. I wish more than anything that he lived next door.

I don't regret any of the bullshit we experienced in the last 32 years, but I am more likely to recall the good stuff - like the mashed potato patties, the steak fondue, the motorcycle rides, and the lighter between his toes.

I love that crazy man, and I am thankful that he stuck around long enough for me to realize it.

Public Apology

2011-06-11T13:28:00.000-07:00

My sincerest of apologies to anyone I offended with a post I made last month. I am greatly sorry that my message came across as disrespectful.
As a person who expresses myself through writing, I expect that not everyone will agree with what I post. However, I never ever desire to be hurtful.

As requested, I have removed the post. Again, I am so sorry.

"Unbreakable" by LB

2011-06-03T20:26:00.000-07:00

"Unbreakable" by LB

My good friend LB wrote a pretty awesome poem. Check it out!

Another Stolen Quote

2011-06-02T23:41:00.000-07:00

This time, I'm stealing a quote from Stacy (who copied it from a book). It brought tears to my eyes and I'd like to read and reread it often - like every time Chris makes me frustrated.

"You, my dear friend, will be a bride for one day, but you will, with God's grace and your very own hard work, be a wife to this man every day for the rest of your life. Being a bride is super-fun, but it pales in comparison to the thrill and beauty of being a part of one of the truly greatest partnerships. Make your love story one worth telling. Make it one worth living, every day, as long as you both shall live."

I love when she writes about marriage.

I Had a Dream

2011-05-29T12:08:00.000-07:00

Last night I dreamt that Dae and I were visiting my sister. He said his first sentence "No one knows me here."

The dream was present day, he was a smidge older, but not yet a year. We were sitting outside, him on my lap, maybe by a bonfire. I asked him something, can't remember exactly what, but he responded with words - big words. Lots of them. "No one knows me here," he said, as he looked right into my eyes.

I said "Do you want to leave?" And he said, "Yes."

It's crazy that I dreamt about his first sentence. The fact that my sister was a character in the story complicates matters.

I don't often spend a lot of time thinking about my dreams. There are two from junior high that I remember vividly. There's one from my first marriage I remember. There's a couple I have written about. There are a few more from my pregnancy - my baby having chin-length wavy red hair, my baby getting kidnapped, and hearing my baby laughing during an ultrasound.

I've never dreamt about my sister before, but now I have - TWO nights in a row. I find it hard to believe that doesn't mean SOMETHING. What though?

The meaning of his first sentence, "no one knows me" is laced with multiple possibilities. Is he saying I should allow him to know his aunt? Or just stating a fact? Or is he implying that he doesn't like it that no one put forth effort to know him?

I got the impression that we'd been sitting there a loooong time and he was saying, "Look, we tried. We came. We put ourselves out there and not one person spent a significant amount of time talking to us. These people are not worth our time."

My relationship with my sister is complicated, and yet described so simply - there isn't one. And most likely, both of us are too hurt and jaded to make the first step to change it.

It's unfortunate for our children, because my sister and I have managed to follow in the footsteps of every single member of our family (BOTH sides). A family member pisses us off or hurts our feelings and we write them off, never to speak to them again.

When my sister and I were close, I believed we could break that viscious cycle. I had a dream that we would be lifelong friends...

Big Picture

2011-05-22T08:59:00.001-07:00

I cannot see the big picture.

I was watching another episode of House. In this episode, there was a patient who needed a kidney. Her girlfriend happened to be a match. Dr. Cameron, somehow, found out that the sick patient was planning to leave the girlfriend. Dr. Cameron spent most of the episode trying to convince the patient that she shouldn't accept a donation from the girlfriend she was planning to break up with.

Dr. Cameron often has morale issues on the show, but no one else on the team ever seems to care. In this particular episode, House was adamant that Cameron not tell the donor that she's donating a kidney to a partner who doesn't love her. House reasoned that their job is to keep their patient alive. If they didn't get the donation the patient would die. Cameron's argument was that the girlfriend deserved to know the whole truth prior to putting her life on the line.

I spent the episode sided with Cameron (as always). If the donor's motives were selfless, she would do it regardless. If not, then she really shouldn't be donating an organ anyway...

At the end of the episode, Dr. Cameron was sitting with the organ donor. The donor tells Dr. Cameron that she knows her girlfriend was thinking of leaving her. Surprised, Cameron said, "you donated your kidney anyway?" And the donor replies, "Now she'll never leave."

Her response threw me for a whirl. But it also reiterated to me one aspect of the Zen stuff I've been reading over the last year. Part of it says that we shouldn't judge anything as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative, because we can't see the future. We don't know how the whole story will play out, so we have no way of knowing whether a situation will have a positive or negative impact on our lives.

And like often happens, this Buddhist lesson perfectly complements Biblical truth. We cannot judge, because we are not omnipotent. Only God can see from A to Z and for us to prematurely judge something (or someone) good, bad, positive, negative, whatever, could potentially interrupt God's plan.

House's Mentality

2011-05-16T19:22:00.001-07:00

I've watched a LOT of House since about my 7th month of pregnancy. In one episode, I actually learned something pretty profound...

In an explanation to his psychologist, House explained that he chose to stay miserable because it seemed 'fair' to him. At some point, he had caused someone pain, and so he had to feel equal pain.

His psychologist said, 'You are not God. Accept the circumstances as they are. Apoligize if you did wrong and then move on."

So...praise the Lord in good times and bad, but most importantly don't try to control something you are not in control of.

Follow-Up to "Know It All"

2011-05-15T11:42:00.001-07:00

I stumbled upon this blog I wrote almost 4 years ago. In the blog, I recount some lessons I learned through out my mid twenties. At the end, I ponder what lessons I'll learn over the next 4-6 yrs.

The lessons I listed were quite profound, honestly, and I am thankful that God provided me the opportunities and the open-mind to learn those lessons.

But mostly, as I read those words, I felt like I was reading the words of a stranger! At first I thought it was cuz I hadn't learned anything profound about myself, or because I had stopped trying to learn anything profound about myself. Then I thought maybe it was age that caused the divide between Leslie of 2007 and Leslie of 2011.

And then I finally figured it out - I became a mom :) And not just to Daelen, but to Brytin, too. When we lived on OC, Brytin didn't stay with us but for a few days each month. But Since Feb 22, 2008, my days have been consumed with parent-type thoughts. How can I better handle this? Why is he doing that? How can Chris and I be a better team? What homework does he have this week?

And then I got pregnant and those thoughts quadrupled! I've spent almost a year now focused on all things baby. I read umpteen books learning all about babies and how best to do this that and the other. I contemplated how I would handle various situations. As a family, we discussed all the changes that would take place and how we could embrace them.

And now, as I reread those lessons I learned eons ago, I pray that my sons learn them thru me - earlier than I did.

Halliburton? Really?!

2011-05-14T22:38:00.000-07:00

You'll notice on the right side of your screen that I added a new gadget to my blog: Popular Posts.

When I saw this new gadget, I was uber excited to find out just what my readers read! I even briefly contemplated whether I would write more of whatever it was to hopefully make my readers happy...

And then I saw that THIS is my most popular post. What a drag. Hopefully some of the researchers who stumble across my blog stick around to read a little of my emotion, my wit, my politics, my religion, my life...

Alone

2011-05-11T16:18:00.000-07:00

Just realized baby can't go into pre-op room...which means Chris can't either. I may be strong, stronger than most of you realize, but I draw my strength from the family God has blessed me with. I do not gather strength by my damn self.

posted from Bloggeroid

Just Another Sunday Part Deux

2011-05-09T12:21:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was again, Just Another Sunday.

Maybe next year...

Rambling

2011-05-05T19:40:00.001-07:00

I don't write enough. I want to write everything everyday. For my sanity, for historical data, for insight. But alas there has been one thing or another keeping me from writing. First it was Farmville. Then carpal tunnel. And now its the baby attached to me 23 hrs of the day.

Thankfully I have a smartphone that has the Note Everything app that allows me to take notes. And I have the Bloggeroid app that allows me to post notes from Note Everything to my blogs. But I still don't do it often enough.

There is so much running through my mind everyday (kids, politics, religion, marriage, jokes, etc). I wish I could just sit and write it all out. I have been diligent in keeping a five-yr journal. (One or two sentences about each day.) I started it March 29, 2011. It will be interesting, I think, to read it in 2016.

I first saw a five-yr journal many moons ago. I instantly wanted it, but didn't buy it because it was $80. I still haven't bought one because the books on the market now are not as nice as the one I previously passed up...I keep it on my phone. This way I have access to it every night. About once a week, I email the note to myself for safe keeping.

Anyway, that's my lesson/rambling today...I don't write enough.

posted from Bloggeroid

Immobilized

2011-04-08T23:01:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I am still immobilized. At least the last two months of my pregnancy I could not do much except lay on couch with feet up watching tv (carpal tunnel and swelling apparently caused by pre-eclampsia). From Monday evening 3/28 to Thursday morning 3/31 I was literally bed-ridden.

And ever since, I have spent most of my time lying down. Not because I'm tired, but because sitting, standing and walking all cause pain in the hematoma. And apparently as the swelling subsides, the pain increases.

But even if I felt outstanding, my son wont sleep without a human body touching him...he falls asleep while nursing. I lie with him 30, 60 or even 90 min. Then the second I try to put him in bassinet or rocking chair, he wakes up. No sound ever makes him stir, but take away his mom or dad and he is instantly awake. Its adorable. Its endearing. Its kind of a pain in the arse whenever I need to eat or go to bathroom or am just really not interested in lying in bed. But the boy really has my best interests in mind because the more I lay around, the quicker I will heal...

posted from Bloggeroid

posted from Bloggeroid

2011-03-29T08:57:00.001-07:00

Today is the day I will see your face. Today I will kiss you hold you tell you I love you. Today I will greet you with a smile regardless of the circumstances.

2011-03-26T16:57:00.001-07:00

I cannot wait for this carpal tunnel to go away so I can write! Even with a newborn, I will make time for writing. No longer will I be imprisoned!!

High Expectations

2011-03-10T16:34:00.001-08:00

Similar to how I have high expectations for Chris as a husband and Brytin as a son, I have higher expectations for myself. And I never allow folks to be less than their potential without at least acknowledging that I know they can be better...I hope I dont make others feel like I make myself feel...

posted from Bloggeroid

Sister

2011-02-21T07:36:00.001-08:00

I think of you sometimes.

Yesterday was difficult to not have you near.

I don't expect anything to change between us.

I just think of you sometimes.

posted from Bloggeroid

Commitment

2011-02-15T09:51:00.000-08:00

Some of you may not know this, but I have been divorced. I failed in my commitment to my first husband. Not from lack of effort, believe you me, but because I allowed myself to grow weary and tired. I refused to acknowledge the problems my ex-husband and I were having to anyone outside of the relationship and thus the communication between him and I failed - at every turn. There's 1,000 additional layers to that story, but at the bare bones of it all, I gave up.

I was very embarrassed by that fact for a long time - to the point where I had almost begun to forget that I was ever married before November 23, 2007.

However, I now believe that remembering the mistakes I made helps me to better understand the word "commitment."

I remember when my first husband and I were first married, I read an article in Relevant Magazine about "starter marriages" and thought it was the most absurd thing I'd ever read about. People getting married, then divorcing within five years and claiming they learned a lot about marriage, commitment, etc...It seems an oxymoron to learn about commitment through divorce, but I have to acknowledge, it happened in my life.

I swore up and down forever and ever that I would never ever ever get divorced. My parents were divorced and it was ugly and I wanted no part of it. I make no excuse for my choice to sin, please don't misread. Divorce IS ugly and should be avoided at all costs. I NEVER advocate for that choice - especially since I've been through it.

But it IS possible to learn about commitment through divorce.

But more than love it's about commitment. Because it doesn't matter how much you love someone if you're not committed to them.

Come hell or high water.

Love or hate.

Mountain top moments and deep, dark valleys.

Winning the lottery or declaring bankruptcy.

Perfect health or a fatal diagnosis.

Or just year after year after year of living life as two sinful people trying to love Jesus.

It's hard. Really hard. And that's why it's not about how you feel. It's not about your emotions. It's not about getting your needs met. It's about a commitment.

You made a commitment. You said I do, I will, I promise.

That means you change your career if you aren't seeing your spouse enough. You rearrange your life to make it work. You go see a therapist. You become authentic like you didn't know was possible. You ask someone to pray for you and your marriage.

You do whatever. it. takes.

He doesn't love Jesus? So what. You love Jesus with all that you are, follow hard after Him and pray to God that your husband might be won over by the godly behavior of his wife.

When divorce is off the table...when it's not even an option - it will change things. Communication and openness will reach a deeper level.

I read these words written on Valentine's Day by my friend, and they resonated in my soul. I feel them. I live them. I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I will never give up on being Christopher Broussard's wife.

If you learned that without having to go through a divorce first, I'm VERY VERY VERY happy for you. But I couldn't, and that's okay too.

Role Model

2011-02-12T09:45:00.000-08:00

Apparently, Leslie Broussard is a role model. LOL Check this out!

Ladies, HIDE your daughters!

"Forever" by Sarah Writes

2011-01-31T10:06:00.000-08:00

I read this beautiful poem today and wanted to share it with anyone who would read it.

Forever My Friend

Where would Bonnie be without Clyde by her side?

What would have happened to the three amigos if one of them died?

What would be me if I never had you?

The only person I tell everything to.

The person I call on my best and my worst.

Whether I’m crying or laughing I think of you first.

There have been times when I’m stuck in more than a bind

But you have been there to save me from myself every time.

Without judgment, comment, or a condescending gaze.

You have always been there through my every ridicules’ faze.

You’re like a rock, and I’m like the wind.

You’re stronger than me, you have always been.

Your tougher, more stable, and wont me moved by my breeze.

By same unpredictable wind that has pushed everyone else away from me.

Gentle or fierce I can go off both ways, yet your strong foundation never sways.

You are loving, and caring honest and true

And if I’m in a fight I always count on you.

To be by my side, guns drawn left and right

Pointed at the opponents, even if you know there right.

I don’t thank God enough for putting you by my side

My forever best friend, even after I die.

In my world you’re Bonnie, and I guess that makes me Clyde.

:)

She has more awesome poems. Check 'em out!

L-O-V-E LOVE

2011-01-29T07:20:00.000-08:00

Love is an emotion that combines compassion, trust, adoration and laughter into great big invisible package I give to someone else.

posted from Bloggeroid

Long Forgotten

2011-01-21T18:12:00.001-08:00

I've written so much over the years, I often forget the really important stuff.

"I can only control myself. I cannot change my husband. I can only control my actions and responses. If Chris chooses to be a less than spectacular husband, he will have to live with that. When he is 80 years old, he will bear the burden of regret for the opportunities he chose to ignore. Not me. I can control my choices. I can choose to be an amazing wife every single day. I can joyfully take care of his home, his son, and his finances. If he chooses to be a schmuck, that is his loss. He loses out on the opportunity to be an amazing husband, but that does not change my opportunity to be an amazing wife."

I wrote that about a year ago. It was a part of a series I did - review of the book, "How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It." I recommend rereading my series of blogs, and then buying the book and reading that, too!

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Effective Communication (With links to some other really old blogs!)

LIBERATED!

2011-01-18T09:03:00.000-08:00

Remember my word of the year? (Hint: starts with a "G," rhymes with "race." LOL)

Well let me tell you - today, that grace has led to a feeling of liberation!

I set the goal of a book a week, and I had a plan for January (for at least the first three books).

Today, however, I returned two of them to the library. (GASP!) Why? Because I don't WANT to read them!

"Mindful Motherhood" had an amazing introduction that talked all about being a zen-like mommy - calm, cool, collected and present (or mindful). The introduction roped me in.

"When you get more comfortable with the fact that everything is always changing, you begin to pay more attention to riding the waves of life rather than struggling against or trying to control them."

I NEEDED to be that kind of momma for Baby B.

I finished reading "What Mothers Do," on Jan 15 and immediately began "Mindful Motherhood."

Interestingly, mindfulness (aka Zen) book brings much anxiety and negative thought about motherhood compared to "What Mothers Do."

When reading Naomi's book, I felt capable, understood, almost revered for the challenges I am about to face. Mindfulness book, thus far, recounts extremely negative situations and then tells you to accept them as they are. (I.E. a screaming baby in a grocery store, a screaming baby on an airplane, or a screaming baby at home.)

I know that those situations exist, and I know that I will have to face them, but the author just didn't present them in a way that made me believe I could handle them in a calm, cool or collected manner. So I ditched the book halfway through.

The second book I was liberated from in this year of grace, was "No One's the Bitch." Like I said previously, I was initially excited to read it, because I felt like it would help me develop a better attitude about the mother of my stepson and hopefully encourage me to extend an olive branch...

However, throughout the introduction, I kept thinking to myself, "I really don't care." My stepson is well taken care of by his three parents, regardless of the fact that his mommy and stepmom have barely exchanged three sentences in a year and a half. Sure, the situation could be better, but it doesn't have to be, and I am not interested at this stage of my life to put forth any effort to change it. So, I returned the book.

LIBERATED!

A Third-Tri Hormonal Shift

2011-01-13T11:12:00.000-08:00

A friend recently posted a great question: "How is Your Marriage?" It was a wonderful post that reminds us all that we need to show concern for others.

But, mostly, it reminded me of how truly amazing my husband is.

I mentioned previously, that my husband and I made the decision to forego depression medicine while I am with child.

I have continued with weekly therapy appointments, just to make sure someone is keeping an unbiased eye on my mental health - for my sake and my baby's. This week, my therapist and I agreed that meeting twice a week is probably going to need to occur for the remainder of this pregnancy.

This pregnancy has not been easy for me. I have enjoyed my pregnancy. It's been a wonderful experience for myself, my husband, my family and friends. But truthfully, it has been physically difficult. I am not used to being hindered in any form, so to be unable to write because my hands hurt, to be unable to sit because my ribs hurt, or to be unable to sit on the floor playing with my stepson because it is WAY to hard to get back up, is just, well, difficult for me emotionally. I have spent (probably WAY too much time and) energy lamenting the difficulties and berating myself for being "less than perfect."

My husband, however, has been such a trooper! He rubs my hands, he makes me lie down, he spends extra time with Brytin so he doesn't feel left out, and he tells me often how beautiful I am :)

And the last couple weeks...well, let me tell you, my husband deserves a medal.

You see, throughout a female's life, there are various hormonal shifts in her body and brain that prepare her for the next step. For example, when a girl is around 14, she begins this journey towards motherhood. Truthfully, it is based on societal circumstances of our cave-dwelling days. We never evolved away from needing a gaggle of women to help us raise our children. So when a girl is 14, she becomes UBER social with the subconscious intent of forming a network to help her when she births her child(ren). Please read the Female Brain. Seriously.

Anyway. I can't prove it either way, but I think that at the beginning of my third trimester, my brain had a hormonal shift towards protecting my connection with my husband AT ALL COSTS. In preparation for the onslaught of changes that will occur once the baby is born, my brain is hell-bent on making sure my marriage goes into that difficult time fully intact. In turn, I've become a little psycho...

I don't mean like Glenn Close boiling a rabbit psycho, I just mean we've been having more "issues" lately than I'd like. Even though I do not think he is wholly innocent in these situations, I can honestly say that my hormones have definitely contributed to my irrational outbursts.

Thankfully, I believe I've finally got a grip on it. Thankfully, my husband is an amazing man. Thankfully, I have friends and family (and a therapist) who are always willing to support us in any way they can.

The Year of Grace

2011-01-11T08:46:00.000-08:00

A blogger recently posed the question, "What is my word for 2011?" I think 2011 is the year of grace.

My friend allowed herself to cry over hot dogs. My other friend owned up to her complete and total failure of a "vegan detox."

And me, well, my only goal was a book per week. 11 days into the year, and I'm still on book 1. But I'm totally okay with it. Its a dense book. Ive learned more than I ever expected. I dont want to rush thru it for the sake of some lofty goal. Yes, 2011 is destined to be the year I give myself some grace.

posted from Bloggeroid

Books! Books! Books!

2011-01-09T02:41:00.000-08:00

Even though I said "my heart wouldn't be in to it," I set a goal for the first three months of 2011.

I plan to read one book every week until the baby is born.

It's a lofty goal, I know, but I keep hearing that once the baby is born, I will not have time to read, and there are just so very many books I want to read!

Book #1 is called "What Mothers Do" by Naomi Stadlen, and boy is it a doozy!

I have been taking notes with the hope that as soon as the carpal tunnel lets up, I'll clue you all in to what I have learned :)

My second book will be, "Mindful Motherhood." I read the introduction and was already able to share some knowledge with a blogging friend (see comments).

PS: She has been blogging for a month and has 4 times as many followers. What gives?! Is there really no one reading my writing?!

Book #3, I think, will be "No one is the Bitch." It is going to help me learn my "place" as a stepparent, I hope...

And then, I plan to round out January with something light. Maybe I'll buy the 16th Stephanie Plum book :)

A New Year?

2011-01-01T14:53:00.000-08:00

The calendar tells me that time has changed. It is no longer 2010, but my mind isn't thinking that way. I really don't care if it is 2010 or 2011. All I know is that every day that passes, I am 24 hours closer to holding a baby in my arms.

Truthfully, 2011 will bring big changes, but not because of my resolve to change myself or my life. And truthfully, 2010 was a huge year for me, but not because of my resolve to make it so.

I could sit here and develop some goals for 2011, but my heart wouldn't be in it. Tomorrow begins my 28th week of pregnancy, and I just don't think that now is the time to focus on getting organized, getting in shape or getting out of debt. Oh, and because I am pregnant, I already quit smoking ;)

So really, this holiday has passed me by, and I am okay with that. 2010 was a great year and 2011 will be even better.

Success!

2010-12-16T08:07:00.000-08:00

I actually did it! We baked a birthday cake for Jesus! I said I was going to do it, and we did it! I am so proud of myself :)

Granted, it didn't go exactly as I had planned...there was no time to decorate the birthday cake because the boys took a loooong time decorating the gingerbread house (that wasn't in the original plan, but was a HUGE blessing). Brytin and I didn't gorge ourselves on birthday cake either, but that probably wasn't a necessary part of the fun.

We mixed the batter together. I baked. I frosted. I lit the candle, and all three of us sang "Happy Birthday." Brytin, of course, enjoyed a piece of the cake :)

Yesterday, a dear old friend posted this status update on Facebook, "if there is one flaw in women, it is this...they forget there worth and how remarkable they truly are!:)"

I think that one of the best ways to remember my worth is to celebrate my successes.

Yay me!

Simple Christmas?

2010-12-14T09:22:00.000-08:00

A friend suggested we all focus this year on a "Simpler Christmas."

I can check that off my "to do" list.

I haven't hung a single strand of lights, and haven't yet decided if I even will.

I had good intentions. After Brytin's birthday, I was going to lug all the decorations out. (I always wait until after his birthday.)

But then I found out he'll be gone for the ten days preceding Christmas, and I just haven't been able to muster the energy to do any of the awesomely fun stuff we did last year.

Last year was an AWESOME Christmas - my favoritest. I will always remember it. I wasn't overburdened or burnt out or anything like that. I had every intention of working the same game plan this year. But, when the child will be gone for ten days, it just sort of changes the game, I guess.

Life has been pretty difficult for me since Thanksgiving. It was a pleasure to serve a Thanksgiving feast. But the pain that has invaded my hands and my ribs since...well, let's just say I've been a crabbypants for a few weeks now...

So, as I reread my friend's blog posts about simplifying our holiday celebrations, I am reminded that Christmas really can be best celebrated in many simple ways.

+ Every time Brytin and I are in the car, and it is dark outside, we take the time to enjoy the Christmas lights others have hung.

+ Christopher received a Christmas present that he truly truly truly L-O-V-E, LOVES. (An ipod nano.)

+ We take our dog for a walk after dark, so we can enjoy the Christmas lights in our neighborhood.

+ We took Brytin ice skating - and Chris had a FABULOUS time :D

+ I got a pea in a pod ornament to commemorate my pregnancy.

Brytin leaves tomorrow, so there really isn't time for much Christmas fanfare. I think that before he goes, he and I will bake a birthday cake for Jesus. And I will thank Him for a holiday that has so far been filled with peace and joy and love.

(Birthday Cake idea stolen from article, "Have Yourself a Very Simple Christmas."

People-Pleaser Checklist

2010-12-01T13:15:00.000-08:00

Ever wondered if you are a people-pleaser? I found this people-pleaser checklist in "Be Happy Without Being Perfect" by Alice Domar.

1. I should always do what others want, expect or need from me.

2. I should take care of everyone around me whether they ask for help or not.

3. I should always listen to everyone's problems and try my best to solve them.

4. I should always be nice and never hurt anyone's feelings.

5. I should always put other people first, before me.

6. I should never say no to anyone who needs or requests something of me.

7. I should never disappoint anyone or let others down in any way.

8. I should always be happy and upbeat and never show any negative feelings to others.

9. I should always try to please other people and make them happy.

10. I should try never to burden others with my own needs or wants.

You may need to replace "other people" with "my husband" or "my mother" or my "best friend" or "my children" to get a firm grasp on your true situation.

The book suggests writing opposing statements to train your brain to start changing the behavior. For example, "I should always do what my mother wants, expects or needs" could be rewritten to say "I know that I do not always have to do what my mother wants, expects or needs from me. I can choose to give when and if i want to do so."

The X in Xmas

2010-11-29T10:09:00.000-08:00

This morning started the postings on Facebook regarding the man's attempts to remove the religious aspects out of the Christmas holiday. The first major offense being the "X" in "Xmas."

In an effort to set the record straight, I would like you all to know that the "X"
isn't an English alphabet "X." It is the Greek letter "chi."

I realize that Franklin Graham once said that it is "a war against the name of Jesus Christ," but "X" has been used to represent Christ as far back as 1021 AD.

If you don't agree with the "X" in Xmas, then you also need to remove all Labarum from your life.

Rather than focusing on any one of the numerous Christmas controversies, why not focus on making sure you yourself act a little more Christ-like this holiday.

Superfluous Spending is Stupid Regardless of the Actual Total

2010-11-21T12:23:00.000-08:00

Hyperbole often leads to people actually missing the point.

There was this big hubaloo a couple weeks ago regarding whether or not an Administration trip to India was costing the taxpayers $200 million per day.

The local newspaper included a reprint of Thomas Friedman's op-ed piece (with a new title), "Never Let Facts Get in Way of Bashing Obama."

This column does an excellent job of praising Anderson Cooper for finding the truth (a.k.a. doing his job). The column also does an excellent job of pointing out how shameful it was for House Representative Michele Bachmann to have used the information prior to actually checking the facts (and the subsequent use of the misinformation by conservative radio hosts). "All you can hope is that more people will do what Cooper did - so when the next crazy lie races around the world, people's first instinct will be to doubt it, not repeat it."

I agree, people need to check their facts - that's why truthorfiction.com was created!

Unfortunately, the morale of the story - wasted spending - was completely overlooked by the fact that some moron jacked up the figures.

Anderson Cooper was able to find a ballpark figure on how much the President's trip to India DID cost the taxpayers. Robert Gibbs, the White House Press Secretary, was quoted as saying, "[This trip] is comparable to when President Clinton and when President Bush traveled abroad. This trip does not cost $200 million a day."

Cooper then pointed out that "Clinton's 1998 trip to Africa - with 1300 people and of roughly similar duration, cost, according to the Government Accountability Office and adjusted for inflation, 'about $5.2 million a day."

If the initial reporting regarding the trip to India would have said that the trip was costing the American taxpayer $5.2 million a day, we could have had outrage at the fact that the President was wasting our tax dollars on something extremely superfluous. Unfortunately, the story became about the exaggeration and about malicious journalism aimed at "bashing Obama."

From what I could tell, he spent two nights in India. At $5.2 million per day, that totals at least $10.4 million.

For whatever it's worth, I am outraged that millions of dollars were spent to send the President to India to talk about economic growth (a.k.a. outsourcing). This could have been done over the telephone.

Please Be Smarter Than the Proganda Thrown at You!

2010-11-21T10:02:00.000-08:00

Hope for Our Economy is often the message I see in my local newspaper.

I'm all for keeping a positive attitude, but I think these articles are blowing smoke up our collective asses.

The Yahoo article states that "[Unemployment benefit claims] remain near their lowest level in two years." And because of this, and some other convoluted measure of unemployment benefit claims, there is once again "encouragement for the economy."

Really?!

I'm sick and tired of hearing how unemployment benefit claim numbers are improving, and thus signalling an improvement in our economy. To anyone who has half a brain, these numbers don't mean diddly squat.

Why? Because these numbers don't count a plethora of people.

Who? People who are underemployed.

Anyone who took a pay cut (i.e. salaried workers with furlough days).
Anyone who works less hours than they used to (including loss of overtime).
People who are staying at a job they HATE because there are no better options (Military retention at historic highs).
People who are employed less than their skill level (i.e. working as a cashier at the grocery store rather than an accounts payable clerk).
And finally, people whose benefits have run out. (Please notice the first quote above - "lowest level in TWO YEARS." No one gets benefits past two years, so of course there are less benefits been paid.)

It is annoying that the media and the politicians and the economists think the general population is too stupid to know when they are feeding us a bunch of bullshit.

I wish they would just be honest - America's economy is NEVER going to be what it was, and that's OKAY. But that's really a whole different issue :)

Thanksgiving Dinner is ON!

2010-11-14T15:09:00.000-08:00

When I thought about Thanksgiving earlier this month, I was concerned that I might wake up Thanksgiving morning and just not have the energy to cook a turkey and all the fixings. Plus, knowing that my unemp benefits are coming to an end, I was a little worried about the idea of feeding many people for Thanksgiving.

Then, my husband said his co-workers were asking if I was going to cook. Well that just put a little spring in my kick ;) Last year, I so greatly enjoyed providing a meal for some sailors and friends that weren't going to see their families (or just wanted to hang out with us!). I'm really thankful that it impacted some peoples' lives :)

And then today, I opened the Sunday paper to see some AMAZING sales at Ralph's and at Fresh 'N' Easy.

I know this was never meant to be a blog about bargain shopping, but seriously, I am awesome at grocery shopping! I have previously posted evidence of this:

Superwoman
Bargain Shopping

With $68.23, I bought:
39 lbs of turkey
20 lbs of ham
5 lbs rump roast
2 cans evaporated milk
6 cans cream of mushroom soup
2 cans cream of chicken soup
5 cans chicken broth
2 cans beef broth
3 cans vegetable broth
4 cans Hormel chili
4 boxes stove top
4 lbs butter
4 cans cranberries
1 box hot cocoa
3 cans soup

I think we've got Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's and maybe even Easter covered :)

Seriously, Southern California is FULL of transplants! If you don't have family to visit on Thanksgiving, you are more than welcome at the Broussard house :)

The One Thing That's Too Personal to Write About

2010-11-12T21:04:00.001-08:00

Over my lifetime, I have written some very personal things on paper because that is how I have processed the emotions.

Over the past few years, I have published a LOT of those things on the Internet because I enjoy writing and sharing my writing.

Over the last couple months, however, the one thing I have not posted much about is my pregnancy.

I have been writing in a journal (when my carpal tunnel allows), but that journal is for my child to read someday.

The best that I can explain it, is that this pregnancy is MINE (and Chris's, of course). But I just don't want every little piece of information broadcast to the world. I do not put a lot of information on Facebook. I do not post my journal writings. I do not talk to anyone but Chris about my fears and joys and intimate moments with the baby.

I'm such an open book about every aspect of my life - my past, my marriage, being a stepparent, my extended family, my work history, whatever. If you have a question, I will answer it - sometimes even before you actually ask it.

But I guess, one of the quirky things that has happened during this pregnancy is that I am not interested in sharing these special moments with anyone but the father of my baby.

It might be superstition, "If I don't show the universe how excited I am, it won't take it away." There might be a little part of me that just cannot handle being inundated with advice and belly pats and opinions.

But my guess is that I just finally found something very personal and extremely sacred and my love and reverence and happiness is mine alone to enjoy.

Veteran's Day

2010-11-11T05:51:00.000-08:00

PostSecret chose to honor the Veterans this week by posting a four-minute video of postcards from soldiers and their families.

-----Email-----
I am disappointed that you would allow such a biased video to be presented on such an importantly honest website: one of the few in our world these days. (I even arranged a PostSecret Event at my undergrad institution). There is not a single reference to the horrible death and emotional ravages of war and that's just misinformation.

-----Facebook Comment-----
My husband has done two 12 month tours in Iraq. He made it home safely both times. I thought I was "hardened" to all the heartfelt military stuff, but I started crying at the second postcard. Thank you for reminding me how much joy, pride, patriotism, loneliness, heartbreak, empowerment, frustration, sadness, camaraderie, and LOVE there is in being a military spouse.

The first comment, apparently emailed to PostSecret, is so heartbreaking I cannot even find the words to describe my disgust. Though I am biased, I still don't think it is that difficult to separate support of the men and woman of the military from one's personal opinion regarding war.

The Facebook Comment brings me so many tears of joy, I cannot even find the words to describe my pride in being a MilSpouse.

Our First Separation
Thankful Pride
The Man I Support

The Best Laid Plans

2010-11-10T21:10:00.000-08:00

"The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry." The famous line, translated to current English from Robert Burns' poem "To a Mouse," is expertly explained on Dictonary.com as meaning:

"No matter how carefully a project is planned, something may still go wrong with it."

As I learned this summer, God always has better plans. (That Freewill Reunion led to the bun in my oven!)

However, often times it sucks when our best laid plans falter. Rarely is it due to anything we did wrong or planned poorly. Sometimes, our plans just fail. Unfair as it may be, sometimes that is just the way it is. There is no rational justification - there is only 20/20 hindsight that maps the choices that led us to this disappointing moment. Unfortunately, hindsight is a tricky bastard that can lead us awry! We need to be careful that hindsight does not lead us to regret perfectly awesome decisions that just somehow did not work out in the end.

It sucks to watch a loved one's best laid plans falter. Especially when you can see that it was not due to poor decisions or faulty planning. It is just one of those unfair shitty life moments. It sucks to be helpless to fix it. It sucks to be only able to say, "Wow. That sucks." Especially when it is someone you really love who truly had perfect plans and some outside force just swoops in and goes Katrina all over their lives. Especially when it is someone you really love who is a really good planner who had really great plans that just spontaneously combusted and the remains have the potential to cause irreversible physical, emotional and spiritual damage on peoples' lives.

How do you lovingly encourage someone through that without sounding like you are down-playing it or worse yet, overreacting? How do you help someone without sounding like you are being condescending or even worse, pitying them? How do you shrug it off and lament with them, all the while encouraging them to find a better solution than the present - knowing full-well that the PERFECT plan is no longer an option? How do you guide a heartbroken individual to a place where they not only accept the hand they have so rudely been dealt but actually convince them to embrace it with doe-eyed optimism, mindful excitement and even curiousity?

There are no Coincidences

2010-11-09T21:27:00.000-08:00

A couple years ago, I heard a gentleman on the radio talking about his book, "Have a New Kid by Friday."

I finally thought to get the book from the library early this fall when Brytin and I were struggling.

The book, however, must be pretty popular, because it wasn't available for me to check out until around mid-October.

I realized today that the book was due back to the library yesterday, but I hadn't even cracked the cover (too busy reading mommy-to-be books)!

I tried to renew my check out, but of course, could not because someone ELSE has already requested the book!

So I started reading, thinking I could just skim it and return it this afternoon and the fine would be 25 cents, no harm no foul.

As it turns out, the book is pretty awesome and I don't want to skim it. But of course, I am too cheap to buy it. BUT, my library has fine free Fridays, so I figure that I keep the book until Friday (so I don't have to actually pay for reading it) and read the book in the meantime. Sneaky and unfair to the person waiting for the book, I know, but I promise I'll learn something!

Ironically, 20 minutes ago, I received a phone call from a friend who was having some issues with her offspring. And even though I am only on chapter Tuesday, I was able to give her this helpful advice:

(from pages 26-27) "Today's parents often don't act like parents. They are so concerned about being their child's friend, about not wounding their child's psyche, about making sure their child is happy and successful, that they fail in their most important role: to be a parent. They snowplow their child's road in life, smoothing all the bumps so the child never has to be uncomfortable or go out of his way. And why should he? He's used to having things done for him."

I suggested she let a snowball hit the boy in the face ;) I think I've spent too much time reading "Moms Who Drink and Swear!"

Anyway, all that just say, God sure has a funny way of bringing everything together for the good of those who love Him!

Be sure to read my review of the book :)

Articles on HubPages

2010-10-24T07:08:00.000-07:00

I have been writing in a journal ever since I was a in third grade. I have always enjoyed writing. In high school, that writing bug blossomed from horrible attempts at fiction, to commentary - non-fiction pieces that (hopefully) provide some insight about something you care about.

Back in the MySpace days, I wrote my first ever "blog." Chris and I were breaking up after six weeks of falling in love...

Over the next three years, I wrote occassionally. (Like five days later when Chris and I got back together!) Nothing consistent, and nothing ground-breaking. But at the same time, I wrote blogs that caused people to feel what I felt, learn what I learned and see what I saw. A lot of those Myspace blogs are difficult for me to read, because they are very emotion-filled about MY life. I can still see myself sitting at the computer crying about whatever, and writing my little heart out.

But, I saved them. I moved them to Blogger, because I figured I wouldn't be visiting MySpace much. Thus, in August 2009, the blog "Exercises in Writing" was born. I had always intended to write more, to write better, but sometimes life gets in the way. (See Our Two-Wheeled Adventure and Elementary Escapades for evidence!)

The same month, I stumbled upon HubPages.com. This website intends to be a source of information (like Wiki), but a writer's community, and at the same time a portal for blogs. Make no mistake, I have no ideas of grandeur about my writing "career." I write for me, I write for you, and if a stranger happens upon it - and learns something, sweet.

I more than likely will never write the book I always wanted to. I more than likely will never be a journalist. I more than likely will never be a world-renowned blogger. I'm okay with that :) I'm a wife, a stay-at-home-parent, a biker, a Christian, a daughter, a really great bargain hunter and a friend. Isn't that enough?!

So, all that to tell you that there are some articles I wrote on HubPages, that I think are pretty gosh darn awesome. Unfortunately, they did not get read much. I'll post them here for you to read at your leisure ;)

I hope you have an awesome day.

My favorite Hub articles:

America: Land of the Free?
Barack Obama: Nobel Laureate 2009
Gavin Newsom and Keith Bardwell: Heroes or Villains?

And finally, the article I wrote yesterday:
Voting Dress Code First Step in Restoring Respect

MRS. BONINO

2010-10-23T11:52:00.000-07:00

I am not a creative writer. I cannot write fiction if my life depended on it. But when I come across beautiful works, I definitely appreciate them!

I hope you enjoy!

MRS. BONINO

Learn a little more about the author, Mairdre on Hubpages.

Read all her published works.

Have a writer you love? Or a style of writing you adore? Tell me about it...

2010-10-23T08:48:00.001-07:00

Rather than unneccessarily vaccinating us against chicken pox and the flu, why not find a vaccine for cholera that is killing hundreds in Haiti?

2010-10-16T12:58:00.001-07:00

Even the Harley dealership has Breast Cancer Awareness fliers and sales pitches! Are you kidding me?!

Random Ramblings

2010-10-16T07:23:00.000-07:00

It isn't very often I take to my blog to ramble, but my cat and my back refuse to let me sleep, and I obviously don't feel like cleaning, so here I sit at the computer.

I'm really tired of not seeing the sunrise. Every morning for like two or three weeks has been cloudy. It's annoying. Thankfully, I live in East County, so the sun does make an appearance every day. If it didn't, I would probably have started a riot by now.

My friend Tina started a blog. You should check it out. She writes Letters to God on a pretty regular basis. She has definitely impacted me with her blog! Encouragement is the best motivation for writing - please leave her a comment if she impacts you :)

October is apparently Breast Cancer Awareness Month, and I have been racking my brain for 15 days to try to figure out how to say something in a non-offensive way. And then, I was on PostSecret yesterday and found the answer...

I am not a breast cancer survivor, so please forgive me if I sound insensitive, but isn't everyone in America already aware of breast cancer?
Over the weekend, I saw the NFL covered in pink. Last night, I was at grocery store and the employees were wearing pink. Almost every shelf had at least one product that was making a donation to breast cancer research...All I could think was, why aren't the guys lobbying so furious for prostate cancer research? Why do the women who have breast cancer get all the glory? There are a billion different kinds of cancers, why is breast cancer so "trendy" and everyone else hangs out in the shadows? Why isn't October "Cancer Survivors" month or something like that?

And another thing, I am not normally a consipiracy theorist, but seriously...shouldn't there already be a cure for cancer?!! Billions (maybe even trillions) of dollars have been funneled into the "industry" and the best they have come up with in 50 or so years is to lob off our breasts?! Gimme a break. Somebody, somewhere is making money off this whole thing, and it isn't the survivors (or the deceased)!

Chris joined a motorcycle club :) I am super duper proud of him, and excited for him, and really glad to have met all the people from the Royal Aces of San Diego!

My pregnancy is going really well. Except for when I try to sleep, I am never sick or even uncomfortable. Chris, I think, is having a really great time too. Except he's a little bitter that I refuse to find out the sex of the baby! Hey, listen, I have to give birth, I get to call SOME shots! I do not want to know beforehand, and so, he can't know either. No one knows except God and my Muffin. (Even though we're like 95% sure it's a boy.)

The first couple months were a little rough...I quit smoking, I almost quit caffeine, and I had to quit my depression medicine. Needless to say, I was an emotional wreck! Thankfully, my husband was willing to work with me and we survived! Now, honestly, I can't stop laughing. My therapist (whom I still see every week) says that it is entirely possible that I won't need that medicine anymore. (It won't even be an option until I'm done nursing, so it could be like a year from now that we'll have to make that choice.)

Did I tell you my BFF had her baby? Yea, Gavin. September 14th. He's adorable! She sends me pictures all the time. I sure wish I could hold him! It's been a lot of fun talking to her the past four weeks about life with a baby. I've learned a lot from her (like always).

Alright, that's enough rambling. I'm going to try to sleep a little. Have a blessed day!!

Bargain Shopping

2010-10-15T09:45:00.001-07:00

So as many of you know, my husband and I do not have boat loads of discretionary income to spend. We pay our bills and we're pretty close to tapped.

Unfortunately, I have a HORRIBLE habit of spending whatever money we have left. I need to stop this, I know. I justify it, because I am always spending the money on food...but we are never in a place where we NEED food. Plus, I always get really really really good deals on food, only justifying my spending more...It's a horrible habit that I need to stop, but before I stop, can I just tell you how much I bought the other day for $53.29?

Sour Cream
Cottage Cheese
3 Yogurt
Tortilla Chips
Pumpkin Spice Cookie Mix
Frozen Raw Shrimp
Cinnamon Applesauce
Blueberry Fruit Juice
Can of Peas
Can of Carrots
Syrup
Bread
Pomegranate Sherbet
Red Tea
Printer (from Wal-Mart)
Haircut magazine (Hey, a pregnant lady is required to change her hairstyle)
10 lbs potatoes
Cake donuts (pregnant, remember)
2.5 lbs Chicken Legs
5 lbs Pork Chops
3 lbs oranges (that I didn't actually get)
4 avocados
1.5 lbs onions
1.5 lbs zucchini
1 bag carrots
2 lbs tomatoes
1.5 lbs apples
3 cucumbers
1 lb nectarines
3 bunches green onions
6.5 lbs cantaloupes
4 lbs oranges (that I did get)
2 gallons of milk
1 box Kix
1 box Honey Kix
1 box Corn Bran Crunch
1 jar super chunk peanut butter

Seriously, am I good or what?! People should pay me to shop for them!

Why the Peaceful Majority is Irrelevant

2010-09-20T08:42:00.000-07:00

Why the Peaceful Majority is Irrelevant
by Paul E. Marek

History lessons are often incredibly simple.

I used to know a man whose family were German aristocracy prior to World War II. They owned a number of large industries and estates. I asked him how many German people were true Nazis, and the answer he gave has stuck with me and guided my attitude toward fanaticism ever since.

“Very few people were true Nazis,” he said, “but many enjoyed the return of German pride, and many more were too busy to care. I was one of those who just thought the Nazis were a bunch of fools. So, the majority just sat back and let it all happen. Then, before we knew it, they owned us, and we had lost control, and the end of the world had come. My family lost everything. I ended up in a concentration camp and the Allies destroyed my factories.”

We are told again and again by experts and talking heads that Islam is the religion of peace, and that the vast majority of Muslims just want to live in peace. Although this unquantified assertion may be true, it is entirely irrelevant. It is meaningless fluff, meant to make us feel better, and meant to somehow diminish the specter of fanatics rampaging across the globe in the name of Islam.

The fact is that the fanatics rule Islam at this moment in history. It is the fanatics who march. It is the fanatics who wage any one of 50 shooting wars world wide. It is the fanatics who systematically slaughter Christian or tribal groups throughout Africa and are gradually taking over the entire continent in an Islamic wave. It is the fanatics who bomb, behea
The fanatics rule Islam at this moment in history.
d, murder, or execute honor killings. It is the fanatics who take over mosque after mosque. It is the fanatics who zealously spread the stoning and hanging of rape victims and homosexuals. The hard, quantifiable fact is that the “peaceful majority” is the “silent majority,” and it is cowed and extraneous.

Communist Russia was comprised of Russians who just wanted to live in peace, yet the Russian Communists were responsible for the murder of about 20 million people. The peaceful majority were irrelevant. China’s huge population was peaceful as well, but Chinese Communists managed to kill a staggering 70 million people. The average Japanese individual prior to World War II was not a war-mongering sadist. Yet, Japan murdered and slaughtered its way across Southeast Asia in an orgy of killing that included the systematic murder of 12 million Chinese civilians - most killed by sword, shovel and bayonet. And who can forget Rwanda, which collapsed into butchery? Could it not be said that the majority of Rwandans were “peace loving”?

History lessons are often incredibly simple and blunt; yet, for all our powers of reason, we often miss the most basic and uncomplicated of points. Peace-loving Muslims have been made irrelevant by the fanatics. Peace-loving Muslims have been made irrelevant by their silence. Peace-loving Muslims will become our enemy if they don’t speak up, because, like my friend from Germany, they will awaken one day and find that the fanatics own them, and the end of their world will have begun.

Peace-loving Germans, Japanese, Chinese, Russians, Rwandans, Bosnians, Afghanis, Iraqis, Palestinians, Somalis, Nigerians, Algerians and many others, have died because the peaceful majority did not speak up until it was too late. As for us, watching it all unfold, we must pay attention to the only group that counts: the fanatics who threaten our way of life.

Gavin Scott

2010-09-15T08:44:00.000-07:00

A baby was born on Sept 14th. Not my baby, but a baby I couldn't possibly love any more than if he were my own.

My best friend had her baby :)

It kills me that I haven't held him yet, but I know God is infinitely wiser than I, so there must be some great plan in the works...

Gavin Scott. What an AWESOME name. With a name like that he is bound to be the most popular, most adorable, most hilarious, most intelligent AND most athletic boy in all of Rockford.

As I've written before, Amy is priceless to me. Just as our mothers were close, Amy has been my rock for the last decade. I can only pray that somehow, our children don't feel the 2200 mile distance and become lifelong friends. (Or maybe I have a girl and the Glors and Galsters finally unite?!)

Congratulations, Amy and Brandon!!

If interested, you can read some of her experience on Little Lou Laughs.

Obama's Stimulus Cost MORE than 8 Years of War

2010-08-24T11:36:00.000-07:00

I'm not making that title up. There's even a handy dandy little graph to prove it.

Check out the article here.

* Obama's stimulus, passed in his first month in office, will cost more than the entire Iraq War -- more than $100 billion (15%) more.

* Just the first two years of Obama's stimulus cost more than the entire cost of the Iraq War under President Bush, or six years of that war.

* Iraq War spending accounted for just 3.2% of all federal spending while it lasted.

* Iraq War spending was not even one quarter of what we spent on Medicare in the same time frame.

* Iraq War spending was not even 15% of the total deficit spending in that time frame. The cumulative deficit, 2003-2010, would have been four-point-something trillion dollars with or without the Iraq War.

* The Iraq War accounts for less than 8% of the federal debt held by the public at the end of 2010 ($9.031 trillion).

* During Bush's Iraq years, 2003-2008, the federal government spent more on education that it did on the Iraq War. (State and local governments spent about ten times more.)

I tried to find a concise explanation of said stimulus plan. No go. It's basically $787 billion of tax cuts and government spending. Have you seen the road signs "Putting America to Work." Yea, that's stimulus money.

Interestingly, I did find an article from Reuters in February that states that Obama actually saved America from a depression with this stimulus. However, today CNBC says we are actually in a depression...

60000 illegal immigrant births per year in Texas

2010-08-08T07:49:00.000-07:00

I bought a book at the Dollar Tree the other day, "Let Them In," by Jason L. Riley. I bought it because I am interested in reading an opposing point of view on the immigration issue. And the author promised to debunk all the common arguments made against immigration.

Unfortunately, I have been busy the last couple days and have not yet had a chance to read it. (There are actually a LOT of books on that list of "have not read yet.")

This morning as I was sipping my morning coffee, I came upon this article regarding illegal immigrant births in Texas.

It appears to me that the one side of the argument is that these helpless children have no where to go...that America cannot turn them away just because their parents broke the laws.

The other side is looking at the 14th amendment line that states "all peoples born within the borders of the United States become its citizen," and saying that it isn't necessary in the birth of the child to automatically make it a citizen.

First of all, I would be interested in seeing a comparison between the handling of the babies born in prison and the babies born to illegal immigrants. Both parents broke the law...how are the children treated relatively speaking? Children born to mothers in prison are in a very similar situation, and I believe, they end up in our debacle of a foster care system...

Second of all, the section of the 14th amendment that has been bastardized to allow illegal immigrants to give birth here was meant to protect slaves. It made illegal the state laws that prevented slaves from becoming citizens and from being treated as property.

Maybe that is why there is such animosity between the hispanics and the blacks?

Vicky Gray Deaton's Note Regarding Marriage

2010-08-07T08:23:00.000-07:00

I have no idea where Vicky Gray Deaton got this note. I do not know if she wrote it, or if it happened to someone she knows or if it was just an email forward she received. I do not know. My intent is not to steal it or take credit for it. I did not write this. However, I want you to read it. I want you to learn so many things from it. I want you to feel how the husband, the wife, the son AND the mistress felt. I want you to get a more clear picture of human interaction, human emotion and the human condition...Will you achieve all of these goals I have for you? I do not know, but I PRAY that you at least try.

MARRIAGE...A MUST READ! Saturday, July 17, 2010 at 7:03pm

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

2010-08-02T04:06:00.001-07:00

4318 from home to home. Wow. Time for another oil change. LOL

2010-08-02T02:54:00.001-07:00

Soooooo close! Just wanna sleep! This summer of travel has been dyn-o-mite!! But I'm ready to be home.

2010-08-01T20:52:00.001-07:00

Now that i know my house clean, super xcited to?go home

2010-08-01T20:01:00.001-07:00

Sunset in Nevada was unreal

2010-08-01T19:53:00.001-07:00

Zion is indescribable. The canyon in AZ from UT on I15 is pretty awesome too.

2010-08-01T18:58:00.001-07:00

Still trying to make Vegas by nine...

2010-08-01T17:46:00.001-07:00

Fire in Utah near Kolob :(

2010-08-01T17:25:00.001-07:00

179 to LV

2010-08-01T14:15:00.001-07:00

Made it from Evanston to Nephi without stopping...SLC is way more beautiful than I ever expected. The suburban sprawl seems a little extreme, though...

2010-08-01T13:18:00.001-07:00

388 to LV

2010-08-01T10:56:00.001-07:00

If ever in Evanston, WY, do not bother stopping at Paul's Diner. It took almost an hour to get served less than mediocre food.

2010-08-01T10:31:00.001-07:00

If we stop at Hoover Dam to show Brytin one more cool thing, we'll probly be home around 7 AM Monday.

2010-08-01T10:28:00.001-07:00

By 9 pm and SD another 6 hrs later, or by 3 am.

2010-08-01T10:27:00.001-07:00

SLC to LV is 419 miles. That's about 7 hrs with no stops. (Or at least 9 hrs with my travelling companions). So, if we dont make anymore stops, we'll be to LV

2010-08-01T10:10:00.001-07:00

Stopped for breakfast at Paul's Diner in Evanston. Had no intention of stopping, but figured Brytin and my mom should probly eat!

2010-08-01T09:05:00.001-07:00

144 to SLC

2010-08-01T08:32:00.001-07:00

100 miles from Utah.

2010-08-01T07:11:00.001-07:00

I'm taking over the driving. We have half a tank of gas. We're somewhere on the 80 in Wyoming. I think we're about 18 hrs from home.

2010-08-01T07:09:00.001-07:00

Prairie dogs make the weirdest noise! We fed bread to bunnies, chipmunks, prairie dogs, birds an Jax. Super fun!!

2010-08-01T02:14:00.001-07:00

I dont think I've been to WY before. Unfortunately it is dark and I am tired, so I still havent seen Wyoming.

2010-07-31T19:49:00.001-07:00

So my one goal was to show Brytin the bikes at Sturgis. We finally made it, and he is asleep!

2010-07-31T19:21:00.001-07:00

Ok we are almost to Sturgis. How it has taken us all day I will never understand

2010-07-31T17:00:00.001-07:00

I was more impressed with corn palace than wall drug. But at least I got pocs of Brytin in cut-outs like from when I was a kid

2010-07-31T16:24:00.000-07:00

25 min to wall drug!!

2010-07-31T15:18:00.001-07:00

I never thought I'd say this, but the rolling grasslands of SoDak are really pretty

2010-07-31T15:05:00.001-07:00

OMG at this rest stop there were a million crickets. Where's St. Erho when u need him?

2010-07-31T14:47:00.001-07:00

Mountain Time Zone! We just gained an hour! Thats awesome!!

2010-07-31T14:32:00.001-07:00

Its hot its smells seriously im so over farm country. John Thune??

2010-07-31T13:56:00.001-07:00

Medicine Butte in Reliance, SoDak was a place of worship and sacrifice for the Indians. So named cuz the plants, roots and herbs in area had healing properties.

2010-07-31T12:37:00.001-07:00

Bijou Hills, Red Lake pretty cool :)

2010-07-31T12:29:00.001-07:00

We've only gone like 90 miles in three hours! This is ridiculous. But at least we are having fun :) Took Brytin into Cabela's to see the wildlife exhibits.

2010-07-31T10:17:00.001-07:00

Corn Palace, you are way coole than I've given you credit for the last 20 years.

2010-07-31T10:15:00.001-07:00

Guess who is eating Taco John's????

2010-07-31T08:54:00.001-07:00

320 to Rapid City! Prior to, of course, we'll be stopping at Corn Palace, Wall Drug and Cosmos :D

2010-07-31T08:02:00.001-07:00

PS Brytin is trailering a bike to Sturgis this year. Hopefully I can post a pic when we get home.

2010-07-31T07:59:00.001-07:00

33 miles from SoDak. Saw a motorcycle accident :( Please please please be careful out there. LOUD PIPES SAVE LIVES

2010-07-31T04:35:00.001-07:00

Gassed up, loaded up, donuts, coffee, etc, etc. We are on our way - only 90 min late, pretty good for me and mom!!

2010-07-30T20:15:00.001-07:00

OMG my mom and I are sitting on the patio and there is a little baby mouse running around!!!! EEEK!!!!!!

2010-07-30T20:07:00.001-07:00

Had a wonderful day in MN. My dad loaded my truck with childhood memories and some gifts for my husband. Hoping to leave around 4 AM for Sturgis.

2010-07-30T11:06:00.001-07:00

Gave my bff a hug. She's super cute preggers. Raining in MN today

2010-07-29T18:21:00.001-07:00

Another beautiful sonset in America

2010-07-29T16:04:00.001-07:00

2nd couple i've seen going to sturgis