He is my king, my leader, my man, my friend. Because he holds such a high place of honor in my life, my expectations of him are astronomically high.
I am his queen. I am graceful, beautiful, priceless, timeless, perfect. My pedestal is so high, I can do no wrong.
Two completely different mentalities regarding “cherish.” Neither is right or wrong, but they are mutually exclusive. There is no compromise between the two. I think my way is right, because it (hopefully) inspires growth and increased appreciation and understanding. He thinks his way is right, because it allows his queen to do as she pleases (even if it means FB all day).
So, now what? Do we continue seeing the act of cherishing completely differently? or does one of us jump ship to the other’s definition? Does it matter? I think so. I often wonder why he doesn’t tell me what irks him so I can grow and be better at making him happy or maybe even just explain why I do something so he can better understand...he, on the other hand, often wonders why I always have a complaint about something he is (or isn’t) doing. According to Chris's very own words, "we would never have an issue if she didn’t bring them to me." So, I think it is imperative that we come to an agreement about this.
Obviously, I love it that I can do no wrong in his eyes. Because I know what it is like to have every single move scrutinized and degraded, I would never take advantage of the freedoms my husband has blessed me with.
Unfortunately, I don’t know that it is possible for me to turn a blind eye to anything - ever. Sad, but true. I guess when I say it like that, it sounds like the personality flaw is mine...I can’t help but question. If I adopt that mentality will Chris take advantage? Am I just setting myself up for heartache, loneliness, and a life of total _______(What? What am I really scared of? Have I forgotten what it is like to be fully protected by the one true just and loving God? Have I forgotten that as long as I walk in the will of Christ all things will work out for the good of those who love Him? Even if my husband was to hurt me or annoy me or just do something really stupid – I can’t control his actions anyway, so really what advantage is there to fret over them?)
But wait, this didn’t start out about controlling. Maybe that’s the root of the issue. It is entirely possible that my “high expectations” have melded with my desire to control the world and have thus created a monster!
I still believe that high expectations are good. But, I can now see that my way is not flawless.